Change is coming..

Just kidding! (That's actually Charlotte's ultrasound photo from 18 weeks).
Well -- sort of kidding.  Change is coming, but no, I'm not pregnant.  And hopefully won't be again until 2013, or later!
I thought it would be funny since everytime I say I have news people assume I'm pregnant again.  Hmm.. I guess that's what I get for being pregnant two years in a row.

Anyways,
I am going back to work.  Granted, no one has hired me yet, nor have I started the resume/application distribution process, but I am just so excited.

I LOVE being a mom.  It's the most rewarding job I've ever had.  Watching your babies hit milestones, and master skills is amazing.  But after a year and a half of being out of the workforce, I'm starting to go a little insane.  And it wasn't until last night after picking yet another fight with my wonderful husband, that it finally occured to me why I am so bitter and angry.  I feel like I'm losing a little bit of MY identity. I have always thought that being a stay at home mom was my goal and I would be happy doing so.  It is safe to say that I now realize I need more.  I need something (other than a hobby) that is MINE.  And while school is also on my list to do in the near future, I think a little extra income wouldn't hurt!

Part of me is concerned about how this transition will go.  Obviously, a conventional job will not be what I'm looking for -- childcare for a 3 month old & 16 month old would probably cost me more than what I will earn.  We've decided that I will hope to find something 2-3 nights a week and one day on the weekend.  And go down/up in hours as I need to in order to accommodate our family.  I am EXTREMELY lucky to have a husband like Michael, and I know this.  He does dishes, he cooks meals, he cleans, he bathes the babies, he does midnight feedings, and everything in between.  If we need something from the grocery store at 10pm he goes without a complaint, and if I need a nap in the middle of the afternoon and he's around, he makes it happen.  I know that he will help us get through this transition.  I think I will need to learn to 'let the little things go'.  And if the floor doesn't get washed, or the counter has dishes on it -- that's okay. 

When Kingston was 2-3 months old, I attempted to go back to work as a server, and I was extremely uncomfortable doing it.  I only lasted one shift.  I was not mentally ready to leave my child.  While I will miss both Kingston & Charlotte when I'm working -- I am DEFINITELY ready for a break from being mommy, and wife-Jen.  I will have something for ME outside of the house -- even if it is working.  I don't know if this makes sense to those who are reading it, but I am so excited to go back to work, that it's silly.

I will update when I find something -- the whole search starts tomorrow!  For today -- I will be cleaning the house and doing the laundry while my family is napping.  That's a lie.  I'm going to sit on my non-pregnant ass, drink a Corona, and facebook stalk my friends.  :)
    

Christmas morning at the Krawetz house

This year, Michael and I decided that we wanted to stay at home all of Christmas day/Boxing day.  We are finding travelling with two babies to be extremely exhausting and stressful.  For the one overnight we had in Dundalk, our SUV was FULL to the top with child-related necessities.  So we invited our families to come anytime over the Christmas week to visit.  Unfortunately, Kingston got pink eye and an ear infection on Christmas Eve, so many of our plans got cancelled (he also ended up having a reaction to the eye drops, and broke out into hives -- this is the second time we've been in the ER with him on the 26th of December!).  He was a trooper, and even though he wasn't feeling well he had a great day.   

Kingston checking out his stocking -- MMmmm Jelly beans & Smarties!

The Handy Manny talking tool box -- probably his favourite toy right now.  They jump and sing when he pushes a button. 

Rumbling Chuck -- he talks and drives in circles.  Kingston LOVED it until he moved.  Now he's terrified of it.

Checking out Charlotte's gift from Santa - Laugh & Learn table.  (He actually plays with this a lot too!)

Me and my beautiful babies. 

Kingston's Kitchen

Last week Kingston was given his big cousin Oliver's play kitchen.  This kitchen is a-dorable and in mint condition.  It's a BOYS kitchen.  I can't wait to get some of the playsets (stainless steel pots & pans/dishes/food etc.) from Ikea!  For now we just play tea party with the tea set that Charlotte got for Christmas! 

If you're happy and you know it...

There are very few things that are as beautiful as watching your babies smile for the first time.  And I'm not talking about a "I just pooped my pants" smile.. I'm talking a big, gummy, "hey I recognize you, you're my mommy" smile.  Charlotte first smiled on November 28th -- but unfortunately I didn't catch it with my camera.  So these were taken over the last month or so.  

And of course -- here are some of Kingston's first smiles caught on camera :)

Charlotte is a very smiley baby, and Kingston never was.  Anyone who's ever attempted to photograph him would tell you that getting a smile takes a lot of time and effort.  But when he does smile -- man does he melt his mommas heart.

Necessity or Splurge?

Since having babies my skin has gone from teenager oily to sandpaper rough.  It's awful.  I've almost always used drug store washs and creams, and never really been happy.  I didn't mind the 'La Roche Posay' products that I used for a few months, but eventually they stopped hydrating my skin too.  So yesterday while we were out at the mall doing a few exchanges we went into an amazing store called Sephora.  I had a consultation with a skincare expert who recommended a moisture-rich hydrating line of facial care products called 'Korres Natural Products'.  They smell wonderful (wild rose), and felt great on my also very dry hands. And then I saw the price.  $51.00 for the set.  Which is only a trial size.  Gulp.  

 
I'm not sure if I want these products to be fantastic or wanting them to fail miserably.  Justifying a skin care regimen this expensive could definitely do damage to our budget. 

So my question is: necessity or splurge?

Motivation

or lack of.

Go ahead and ask Michael.  He will tell you that generally speaking, I talk about going to the gym/eating better/losing weight daily.  I wake up in the morning telling myself that I will make time to get to the gym when M gets home, and that I will make time to prepare myself a healthy breakfast/lunch, and I don't do either of these things.  Granted, things like laundry, dishes, or cleaning are on this list too and they don't always get done either.  Eating good food during the day has always been a struggle (since Kingston was a baby). Preparing yourself a meal when you've got a toddler crying for lunch, and a newborn crying for a bottle, is not a priority.  And if by some miracle I can get both babies to take an afternoon nap at the same time, you better believe I'm also napping.  M and I have mutually agreed that after Kingston goes to bed is the best time for us to go to the gym.  We figured it would work out best if we take turns and go on alternate nights.  So far -- M goes pretty regularily, and I've yet to go since moving back to London. 

Being a mom of two babies is exhausting.  But so is making excuses.  Now that Charlotte is starting to sleep through the night, and I'm starting to feel like myself again, I will be going to the gym regularily, and I will be eating healthier.  Wanna know why?  Purely selfish and vain reasons..

I want to fit and look good in the new jeans I got for Christmas. 

Sad isn't it?

I don't believe in New Years resolutions because lets face it, 99% of people don't keep them anyway.  But this is something I will be striving to accomplish.  In the last 24 months I have been pregnant TWICE.  20 months pregnant.  Yep.  That's a whole lot of 'eat whatever you want - because you're going to be fat anyway' time.  Not to mention a 'get out of the gym - free' card. 

So while I will not be giving you my current weight/goal weight, etc.  Let's just say I'm hoping to lose between 10-15 lbs and fit into my beautiful new size 4 jeans. 

".... My name is Jen .. and I'm a Facebook-aholic..."

Michael wakes from nap -- "Who are you talking to?"
Jen -- "No one, I'm attempting to create a Blog"
Michael -- "uhhh... What's a Blog?"

Seriously?  I gave him somewhat of a "don't rain on my parade" type of response.  I asked if he follows any Blogs, to which his reply was no. I can tell you that there are a few Blogs I follow pretty religiously and they belong to people I know.  

I am a Facebook-aholic.  I admit it.  But I can also admit that Facebook leaves me feeling like I have a lot more to say -- especially when it comes to my children and pictures that I post.  I often feel that my friends who don't have children must be thinking, "enough already!  I don't care if Kingston has a new tooth or if Charlotte can sleep through the night."  Status updates can be really annoying, and I agree.  ".. and all the little details" is my alternative to that.  I hope this Blog will be a place where interested friends and family can read about the things my children do, and what we are up to as a family. 

Be prepared for spelling mistakes, grammatical errors, non-words (you know, the ones I make up), and many "...." because really, I type how I talk.  

Oh.  And with all that being said -- Kingston got a new bottom tooth today, and Charlotte slept through the night (10:30 - 7:30!).        

Sidenote: if anyone can tell me specifically how to change the background on the date for each post (right now its a dark grey) PLEASE let me know.  I have tried for about 30 minutes to figure it out.